This ongoing series depicts Kristina Podobed‘s long-time bestie Anya, an eccentric self-mocking Ukrainian blonde with gap teeth who loves flooding Instagram with oceans of tears and lines of mad love for her boyfriend Maxim.
INTERVIEW: IRA LUPU
PHOTOGRAPHY: KRISTINA PODOBED
If you get really old, how will your life be like?
Oh God, I’m answering this question straight from cancer hospital lobby where I’m waiting in the line to see my doctor. I’m all surrounded by feeble and sick folk up here so now I’m having all the most splendid thoughts on getting older.
Well, to me, oldness is a very disgusting and sad thing. I hope I won’t be poor and lying in some filthy basement or underground crossing. I will just stay a healthy top banana granny. At least I hope I won’t be shitting on myself. But I’ll be dropping my jaw into other people’s chicken soup, for sure.
Do you remember the first present you ever gave to your parents?
Yeah, I gave them my poop in a plastic bag. I’m not sure about the details, I was too small. I just remember I suddenly got an idea to do so and it seemed superb to me. The next thing I recollect is me sitting and shitting straight into the bag, knowingly. Mama was shocked to receive such a surprise. All the relatives were shocked. And I was just giggling, because, well, that was fun. Oh yes, I was also forcing some girl to join my performance, but she refused to. I know my dear Kristinochka would not reject me if we knew each other back then.
I can imagine. What did your grandpa and grandma receive?
Only my loving hugs.
Would you agree that being young is no less ugly than being old?
Of course, just take a look at me.
Why did you decide you’re ugly?
Because, do you think someone beautiful will give his shit in a plastic bag? But… Fuck… I’ve changed my mind! Only the beautiful creature would do so. Supposedly, the most beautiful creature on Earth. Me.
Are you happy with the way you look on Kristina’s photos?
I’m OK with my looks, but not really happy with my behaviour.